MODELLING A SPIRITUAL FAMILY

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MODELLING A SPIRITUAL FAMILY

MODELLING A SPIRITUAL FAMILY Recently I was called upon to speak on the subject of “How to grow spiritually in the family” at Cornerstone Assemblies of God Women’s Conference in Pretoria. Whilst preparing for the message, the Lord started to speak to me about the different types of families, the kind of family we should model our families after and the need for sufficient equipping before venturing into family life. Many people get into family life without any idea of what kind of family they need to raise. Sometimes young women and men get married without prior preparation in regard to raising the kind of family God expects. No wonder there is so much disaster, unhappiness and lack of direction in families. In most cases, our point of reference when beginning a family is our parents and how they raised their family. If our parents modeled the wrong kind of family, we are bound to follow their footsteps and repeat the same mistakes. This cycle can then repeat itself with our children and children’s children. Our beacon and ultimate goal should be God’s standard for a family. The goal of this article is illustrate what the spiritual family is and contrast it against the wicked family, the carnal family, the religious family, the single parent family, the blended family, the un-equally yoked family and the traditional family. Hopefully this article will give the younger people aspiring to get married an assignment to pray, fast and seek adequate equipping before jumping into the sacred institution of marriage and family life. I am not going to be writing as an expert but as one that is seeking God for His Kingdom to come, here on earth as it is in Heaven. For those already married, I pray that this article will shed some light in the dark and gray areas. Let it be a plumb line that will reveal that which is not in alignment. May the Holy Spirit illuminate and bring guidance, healing, joy, harmony and peace into your family in Jesus name. Amen A family in Hebrew “is ה mishpâchâh mish-paw-khaw’ is a circle of close relatives; figuratively a class (of persons), a species (of animals) or sort (of things); by extension a tribe or people: - family, kind (-red)”. In Greek, πατριά patria pat-ree-ah' As if feminine of a derivative of paternal descent, that is, (concretely) a group of families or a whole race (nation): - family, kindred, lineage.” A spiritual family is one in which; each member has submitted to the Lordship of Jesus Christ (John 3:6-16), the Holy Spirit takes prominence (Acts 1:8), where there is distinction between the soul and the spirit (Heb 4:12), the inner man of spirit is continuously exercised (Eph 3:16), the presence of God is valued more than material things (1 Chro 13:14), the father of the house emulates father God (2 Thess 3:7), the wife submits to her husband (Eph 5:22-24), Children honor their parents (Exo 20:12), There is hunger and thirst for righteousness (Mat 5:6), the family takes up the cross daily and follows Christ (Mark 8:34), the family ministers material things to those that minister spiritual things (1 Cor 9:11), there is order in the family (1 Tim 3:3-5). The family follows the ordinances of God e.g. Communion, Baptism, Tithes (Joshua 24:15), the family does not love the world (1 Jo 2:15), the family consistently fasts and prays (Isa 58), the family is on guard against the onslaughts of the devil (Eph 6:10-18), the family pursues humility (Phil 2), the family lives with Eternity in mind (Heb 11:16), spiritual gifts are cultivated (1 Cor 14:1), there is a conducive home environment (Proverbs 14:1), there is transparency (Gen 2:15), conflict is resolved amicably (Matt 18:15-20), marriage bed in not defiled (Heb 13:4), and there is good stewardship (1 Pet 5:2-3). The relationship of Jesus Christ with His Heavenly Father should guide us as we seek to form a spiritual family. He never did anything without the approval of His Father. He was fully submitted. In a spiritual family, the father should strive to be fully submitted to God. His wife and children should submit to God and to the leadership of the father. The physical father should be willing to submit to a spiritual father that God has placed in his life. As indicated above, in Greek the word family is taken from “patree” a derivative of paternal descent. There is no family without fatherhood. I believe families are under such great attack because of the onslaught of the devil on fatherhood. I trust that the Lord will start a mighty work of restoration and spiritual alignment of fatherhood. This is of uttermost importance if we are going to have spiritual families. The father must lead the way. Fatherhood is not about siring children. It is a spiritual function. We have many men siring but not fathering! A wicked family is a depraved home where unrighteousness thrives. It is a demonic family. The family of Ahab and Jezebel is a good example of a wicked family. A wicked family serves Satan and his demons. They are involved in either one of these; cults, occult, Satanism, human sacrifice, human body parts trafficking, drug abuse, pedophilia, witchcraft, bestiality, perversion, homosexuality, crime and the like. The moment one of the parents gets involved in one of the above, the Lord of Heaven regards that family as a wicked family. Dire consequences are likely to follow all members of the family. Children born in such homes are bound to multiply the wickedness of their parents unless completely delivered. A Christian who comes from such a background must deal with the root of wickedness otherwise the fruit will emerge when not expected. “Can you imagine witnessing your husband having sex with a dog?” Recently we were confronted by such a situation, a traumatized lady seeking counsel as to what she should do. This was her reality. I don’t know what you would have told her. The question is; are all marriages ordained of God? Is it God who binds all couples together or is the devil involved in some of the binding together? “Wherefore they are no more twain, but one flesh. What therefore God hath joined together, let not man put asunder.” Mat 19:6 In the Bible there is a good example of a wicked family; “And it came to pass, as if it had been a light thing for him to walk in the sins of Jeroboam the son of Nebat, that he took to wife Jezebel the daughter of Ethbaal king of the Zidonians, and went and served Baal, and worshipped him. And he reared up an altar for Baal in the house of Baal, which he had built in Samaria. And Ahab made a grove; and Ahab did more to provoke the LORD God of Israel to anger than all the kings of Israel that were before him. In his days did Hiel the Bethelite build Jericho: he laid the foundation thereof in Abiram his firstborn, and set up the gates thereof in his youngest son Segub, according to the word of the LORD, which he spake by Joshua the son of Nun.” 1 Kings 16:31-34. “For it was so, when Jezebel cut off the Prophets of the LORD, that Obadiah took an hundred prophets, and hid them by fifty in a cave, and fed them with bread and water.)” 1Ki 18:4 notwithstanding I have a few things against thee, because thou sufferest that woman Jezebel, which calleth herself a prophetess, to teach and to seduce my servants to commit fornication, and to eat things sacrificed unto idols. Rev 2:20. “And it came to pass, when Jezebel heard that Naboth was stoned, and was dead, that Jezebel said to Ahab, Arise, take possession of the vineyard of Naboth the Jezreelite, which he refused to give thee for money: for Naboth is not alive, but dead.” 1 King 21:15 In the wicked family the Jezebel spirit is manifest. Jezebel was the manipulative, controlling, stubborn, scheming, evil, malicious, greedy wife of Ahab. She was involved in murder, adultery, land grabbing, demonic worship, demonic teaching, child sacrifices, seducing men of God etc. She was as wicked as her husband and more. A woman who has one of these characteristics is manifesting a Jezebel spirit and can only form a wicked family. It is amazing how the Jezebel spirit is sometimes evident even in young girls. We bind it and destroy this spirit in your life as a woman in Jesus name. Amen. Born again women need to watch against the Jezebel spirit because it is contrary to the Spirit of God. They need to learn submission, the fear of God, pursue a quiet and gentle spirit. These are the hallmarks of a spiritual woman ready to form a spiritual family. The carnal family is not necessarily wicked like what I have described above; it is a family that loves the world and things of this world to the extent that God has been put on the back burner. A carnal Family pursues material things like cash, car, and cell phones to a level of compromising their walk with God. Mammon is the god in this kind of a home. The husband is up and about pursuing money, The wife is busy spending the money to keep up with the Jones’s; the children have all manner of gadgets, a lot of time is spent on entertainment, in front of a TV screen, and in pursuit of worldly things. Praying and seeking God in a carnal family is secondary. Humanism has a way of creeping into such a family. When it comes to marriage, girls raised in a carnal home look for men with money, looks, status in the society, a good inheritance etc. The boys on the other hand look for girls that are sexy, cultured, young and vibrant, educated etc. These things should not be the basis of choosing a marriage partner. If you are married to one from such a background, you will always be under pressure to keep up with the Jones’s because the world is continually changing! “Love not the world, neither the things that are in the world. If any man love The world, the love of the Father is not in him. For all that is in the world, the lust of the flesh, and the lust of the eyes, and the pride of life, is not of the Father, but is of the world. And the world passeth away, and the lust thereof: but he that doeth the will of God abideth for ever.” I Jn 2:15-17 “For Demas hath forsaken me, having loved this present world, and is departed unto Thessalonica; Crescens to Galatia, Titus unto Dalmatia.” 2Ti 4:10 A religious family on the other hand might be rich or poor, but merely church goers. The spirit that is dominant in a religious family is the pharisaic spirit. The pharisaic spirit is a religious spirit. In this religious family, they do sacraments, religious rituals, faithfully attend Church but have not given their lives to Jesus Christ. Children born in religious home assume that they are Christians because they were born into a Christian family. They are not encouraged to pursue a personal relationship with Jesus Christ. It is hard to preach to a religious family because there is an element of self righteousness, self exaltation, spiritual pride, self confidence and trusting in works. “For they being ignorant of God's righteousness, and going about to establish their own righteousness; have not submitted themselves unto the righteousness of God.” Rom 10:3. “And some of the Pharisees which were with Him heard these words, and said unto Him, Are we blind also? Jesus said unto them, If ye were blind, ye should have no sin: but now ye say, We see; therefore your sin remaineth.” John 9:40-41 “What shall we say then? That the Gentiles, which followed not after righteousness, have attained to righteousness, even the righteousness which is of faith. But Israel, which followed after the law of righteousness, hath not attained to the law of righteousness. Wherefore? Because they sought it not by faith, but as it were by the works of the law. For they stumbled at that stumbling stone; As it is written, Behold, I lay in Zion a stumbling stone and rock of offence: and whosoever believeth on him shall not be ashamed.” Rom 9:30-33. The single parent family is one where one parent is raising a child or children by themselves. Single parent homes have become very common even in the church. This single family is as a result of teen pregnancy, divorce, rape, HIV/Aids, adultery, prostitution or the choice to have children for aging unmarried women. In most cases, the mother or father is left to fend for the child and raise the child single handedly. Because this is not God’s design and ideal; this home is faced with many challenges. In cases where the children grow without a father, they develop identity problems, struggle with authority, are prone to homosexuality and are likely to form single parent homes themselves in the future if unchecked by divine intervention. Single women with children are also stigmatized, ostracized, lonely, misunderstood by married women, vulnerable, second best for men looking for marriage partners, have to shoulder heavy financial burdens amongst other challenges. The body of Christ needs to pay more attention to single families and provide support for children growing in such homes. These children need father figures. The women need a safe environment where they can thrive, be accepted and meet possible suitors. Programs need to be developed by the Church to help them with parenting challenges. “And he said, What pledge shall I give thee? And she said, Thy signet, and thy bracelets, and thy staff that is in thine hand. And he gave it her, and came in unto her, and she conceived by him.” Gen 38:18. The woman in this story prostituted and conceived with her father in-law. She formed a single family. The blended family is a hetero-genus kind of family. In this kind of family, either one or both of the parents come with a child or children into the marriage. This kind of family should be encouraged for many single parents although it comes with a multitude of challenges. This is the kind of family Jesus grew up with and we should draw lessons from Him. Jesus was conceived of the Holy Spirit just before Joseph and Mary got married. This must have been scandalous for Joseph who was looking forward to getting married to a virgin. “Now the birth of Jesus Christ was on this wise: When as His mother Mary was espoused to Joseph, before they came together, she was found with child of the Holy Ghost. Then Joseph her husband, being a just man, and not willing to make her a publick example, was minded to put her away privily. But while he thought on these things, behold, the angel of the Lord appeared unto him in a dream, saying, Joseph, thou son of David, fear not to take unto thee Mary thy wife: for that which is conceived in her is of the Holy Ghost. And she shall bring forth a son, and thou shalt call his name JESUS: for He shall save His people from their sins. Now all this was done, that it might be fulfilled which was spoken of the Lord by the prophet, saying, Behold, a virgin shall be with child, and shall bring forth a son, and they shall call His name Emmanuel, which being interpreted is, “God with us”. Then Joseph being raised from sleep did as the angel of the Lord had bidden him, and took unto him his wife: And knew her not till she had brought forth her firstborn son: and he called His name JESUS.” Mat 1:18-25 The blended family comes with the baggage of former relationships. In most cases there is not adequate preparation and thought, and this tends to strain and affect a blended family life. For example, the knowledge that your wife/husband has been sexually involved before creates mistrust and suspicion. It is difficult for parents to raise children they have not given birth to. Children in such homes go through mistreatment, physical abuse, longing for their biological parent, rebellion, suicidal thoughts, insecurity, often times they are not treated equally and sometimes they have distinct features that make them different from the rest of the family. The church needs to provide a safe haven where these children can vent and seek direction. Jesus maximized His potential though He was raised by a step dad. The husband or wife, on the other hand, sometimes doesn’t know how to handle a situation in a case where his or her child is been mistreated by the husband or wife! A woman might be caught in the middle not wanting to take sides for good reasons. This, however, can cause resentment, bitterness, anger, tension to a point where the blended family becomes volatile. Aligning this kind of family with the purposes of God in of fundamental importance otherwise it will fall apart. Post marital counseling is crucial in such cases! The un-equally yoked family is one where one spouse is a committed believer and the other is an un-Believer. This usually happens when one spouse is converted and the other is not or where a Christian marries an un-believer in the hope of converting them. In most cases the unbelievers are much more appealing than brothers and sisters in the Lord. They are willing to spend money, know how to use the gift of gab and are sexually appealing. This is one of the big traps of the devil. In some of the cases where young born again women marry un-believing men, the men lose interest after marriage and start cheating on them. Misery usually comes in the married life. “Can two walk together unless they are agreed”? Amos 3:3 “Be ye not unequally yoked together with unbelievers: for what fellowship hath righteousness with unrighteousness? and what communion hath light with darkness?” 2Co 6:14 . “Likewise, ye wives, be in subjection to your own husbands; that, if any obey not the word, they also may without the word be won by the conversation of the wives; While they behold your chaste conversation coupled with fear. Whose adorning let it not be that outward adorning of plaiting the hair, and of wearing of gold, or of putting on of apparel; But let it be the hidden man of the heart, in that which is not corruptible, even the ornament of a meek and quiet spirit, which is in the sight of God of great price. For after this manner in the old time the holy women also, who trusted in God, adorned themselves, being in subjection unto their own husbands: Even as Sara obeyed Abraham, calling him lord: whose daughters ye are, as long as ye do well, and are not afraid with any amazement. Likewise, ye husbands, dwell with them according to knowledge, giving honour unto the wife, as unto the weaker vessel, and as being heirs together of the grace of life; that your prayers be not hindered. 1 Pet 3:1-7. The traditional family is one that upholds traditional beliefs, polygamy, consults ancestors and traditional doctors, performs rituals to appease ancestors, use charms and love portions. It is impossible to be a spiritual family as God desires and yet continue to uphold traditional beliefs ” …Why seek ye the living among the dead?” Luk 24:5 What is a spiritual family? Why is the fatherhood connected to family? What makes a spiritual family spiritual? What kind of a family did you grow up in? What are the challenges of single parent families? Where would you classify an orphanage? How does a religious spirit manifest in a family? What do you hate about your family? Is it important to look at the family background of a potential suitor and why? What are the challenges of a blended family? What is the role of spiritual parents in today’s families? If you find yourself in a wicked family, what should you do? What are the characteristics of a carnal family? Does the difference in race, tribe or age matter in a marriage and family? In all the families above, what role does sex play? What kind of a family did your grand father raise? What kind of a family did you grow up in? If you are not married, write a comprehensive statement of faith and commitment in regard to the kind of family you desire? Is divorce possible in a spiritual family? Is that family still spiritual if divorce is imminent? Is it possible to be successful in ministry and fail in ministry? What other questions do you want to ask? What are you going to do with the information you have just received? Let me pray for you, Father God, we exalt You and magnify Your name because You are God. Lord I pray for each and every person that has just read this article; Lord God, I speak the God kind of life into their lives in Jesus Christ name. Lord I pray that the same Spirit that raised Jesus Christ from the dead will be at work in them directing and controlling every move. Father God I pray that the spiritual family will be a reality in their lives in Jesus name. Amen. Please give me feedback. In His Mandate, Apostle Symon Kariuki Kingdom Age Network of Apostles and Prophets +27729774462 www.kanap.org
Symon Kariuki
Kingdom Age Network of Apostles and Prophets
PO Box 13754
Hatfield
E-mail: kanapinstitute@gmail.com
Landline:+27729774462
Cellphone:+27123478668